Hi! My name is Jessie, and my eggs are dying.


**This blog is best read while listening the song Crooked Halo by Annie Bosko**

This blog is going to be pretty personal, if that doesn’t interest you then I would stop reading…

Someone said something to me today that really irritated me.  Actually it really pissed me off.   Now I know this may not shock most of you, but this statement in particular really got me thinking brewing.  The statement was: “Do you ever worry that you are going to be too much for a man to be attracted to you?  Like, do you ever think that most men wouldn’t be interested in marrying a PhD?”

…First, can anyone please tell me how you respond to a statement like that politely?  Seriously, I am super interested in suggestions, because I think it would shock you the types of comments I have received on this particular topic.  So, please, any advice on keeping your composure in this situation would be appreciated.

Secondly, it truly shocks me how bold people can be when it comes to the topic of marriage and babies.  Honestly, why are those two topics even a TOPIC?  They are two immensely personal things in a person’s life, and really not anyone else’s business.  Yet, I would venture to suggest that they are two things that people feel almost entitled to comment on.

Now, what I am about to say may sound like the rant of a crazy person, and maybe it is, but I mean every last word.  If I were to have truly answered this person in the way I wanted to, this is what I would have said:  No, no I am not worried about it.  Why, because my life was not created for the sole purpose of hosting a wedding.  Is that something I want?  Yes.  Am I guaranteed to get it? Nope.  Just like I am not guaranteed to receive any of the other things I want in life, that’s life.  What my future holds is an unknown.  What I do know is that I am not going to change my goals, my life path, or myself in order to insure that I get a husband.  Nor will I ever apologize for being a motivated, passionate, outside the lines person.  I would prefer to either find a man who appreciates all of these things about me, or end up a spinster hag.  Maybe that does make me too much, maybe I am too loud, maybe I do give my opinion and speak my mind too freely, and maybe I will be too educated to ever attract a mate.  Maybe that is OK, because honestly if I can’t find a man that is OK with all of that then he isn’t invited to come along for the ride.  To be honest, I may never ever find a man who thinks that I am special, but that in itself does not mean that I am not special.

If there is anything I am really tired of it is the dogma that marriage and babies equals a valuable woman.  Please don’t misread this as me being a bitter woman, please read this as my plea to be judged off of the things that I have, not the things that I am missing.  I shouldn’t have to curve my desire to be successful and live my life boldly just so I will be loveable and desirable.  Can we all please just crack open our minds to the fact that life is not a rehearsal, and it is ok to not follow the script.


Hopefully you don’t all think I am off my rocker.  I promise I have no intentions of breaking anything or using bad language.  I just have to be honest and say that I am so tired of talking about the Ifs and what Ifs in life.  I just want to talk about the now.  Now, I am currently doing my PhD, which I will finish within the year.  I am proud of this accomplishment in my life.  I am very excited to celebrate it, and no, I am not worried that it will be the reason I never marry.  However, if it is, then I am grateful for all the other relationships God has given me in my life, He must have known I would need them.

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